I feel recently certain madness hidden in my body shaking and becoming more and more vigorously. Am I going to mad? Maybe, for I have read something so abstract, so fantastic, so rhapsodic, but blue that I can't write properly. Virginia Woolf is coming again. Flying away home, no! Where am I? Suddenly hit by a stone, I land on an island. Nothing is there, but am I, but sand. I am killing myself by sucking sea water.

I have loved him for a long long time ago. Never know his name do I, just his face I like. Yes, a shallow love but lasted for several years. Now I get used to go there for a sight, a sight of his lovely face. Never talk, never contact, for I love him, for what I have lost. I love to see him.

每一個晚上

每一個晚上 我將會遠望
無涯星海 點點星光
求萬里星際　燃點你路
叮囑風聲代呼喚你千趟
[...]
寂寞時倦時　若你要熱誠目光
只需輕輕把我去想一趟

聽着聽着，我遠望遠望...
望不到點點星光，只有無際夜幕
在石屎森林那有無涯星夜？
一天住在香港，一天風不會飛

「在漫漫長路上，你我未重遇上那天」
沒有你的目光，沒有你的聲音
想你千篇
只知你在遠方，餘下無言
靜下來
淚流千篇

Being Minority

Recently I read by chance an article written by my teacher about "a small group of people and professionalism". A professional is a small group of people, surely, but would you say that they are equal? After reading the article, I resonate a lot about my university life that why I would quite be ambiguous about my personal identification of being minority. My teacher has written that being minor is not so prideful to the equivalent extent of being professional. This is a very unique phenomenon in Hong Kong which really deserves its name--the desert of culture. Yes, I know, as most social and cultural critics have argued that it is a colonial discourse that focuses on high, fine and western culture only, but I want to make a further argument, "so doesn't it matter?" In other words, what I am really asking is why one has to suffer from her/his interest in high, fine and western culture. Aren't we part of the culture we are living? Why in those eyes have I to pretend elite? I am both "elite" and common! No, elite in Hong Kong is not such a person who is able to understand and appreciate high culture. So funny is Hong Kong society that social status is always consistent with one's economic capacity but never with one's cultural appreciation capacity. This is the difference between a professional and a minority as well as the reason of suffering. It is now a shame for being interested in Western classical music, for I am pretending elite.

鐵幕

回到家中，開着電視，天啊！又來國慶文藝晚會香港版。一開場的竟然來郭富城的鐵幕誘惑。我心裡不禁要笑一下呀，因為我大喜歡瞎猜了，在後冷戰出生的我仍舊想起邱吉爾一篇演說中提及的鐵幕(Iron Curtain)：「一道橫貫歐洲大陸的鐵幕已經拉下。」當時媒體有另一詞語來指亞洲的情況，叫作竹幕，但似乎不夠鐵幕那麼具有殺傷力吧，不太流行。時移勢易，當大家相信冷戰已過，連蘇聯也倒台，最後一個共產主義國家–中國共產黨，不，在走中國特色的社會主義，我不知是甚麼屁東西，我只覺得是比資本主義更資本主義的社會主義，也許應該叫做超資本主義，也許又是另一道鐵幕。不過可能是香港人太有創意，太有活力吧，唱着鐵幕誘惑時，大屏幕播放着電腦動畫，它是甚麼？它有八隻腳，左右各四隻，笨拙的擺着，又似蜘蛛，又似蟹，但總之不是好東西，無錯！就是河蟹！讓我戲仿一下，一道橫貫兩岸三地的鐵幕已由河蟹笨拙的拉下來。